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Society today has come a long way from where it was, and it’s not always in a good way. The continual search for instant gratification, with the big push post WWII, with advancements in technology and mass production, has affected our ability to communicate effectively, or to some extent at all.
What does instant gratification and work ethic have to do with communication? The answer is truly very simple. To have a dialogue with someone, especially with someone with a differing or opposing viewpoint, requires a certain amount of work. Your brain has to actually turn on, listen and understand what they are saying, and continue to process information in order to bring out a reasonable point of view. It is far easier and much less demanding to simply surround yourself with viewpoints that mirror your own, or to completely ignore communication because it is easier. With viewpoints that mirror your own, you get the instant gratification you seek with minimal effort; the acceptance and appreciation we all seek is merely automatic.
In contrast, with viewpoints that may differ, there is no instant gratification in a dialogue. A dialogue requires your mind to work to respond logically to what you hear. If what you hear doesn’t make sense, then you have to work to make it make sense. If you disagree with it, then you have to work to figure out WHY you disagree with it and then decide if you still SHOULD disagree with it. If you SHOULDN’T disagree with it, then more work is required to change a learned behavior or thought process. Due to this, there may never be any gratification at all, let alone instant gratification; and because of that, many choose to ignore the dialogue completely and live solely in an echo chamber. An echo chamber by nature requires minimal effort to start up and run, and you receive the instant gratification of hearing your thoughts and ideals bouncing back at you from everywhere.
Communication means a two way street, and that means effort is required.
(Just like getting this posted is requiring a lot of effort, with extremely limited internet!)
Seth, it is indeed difficult to process opposing view points. The up and coming generation has not been taught the skills of critical thinking. Rather, they see “news” casters hurling opinion and insult and calling it fact. Their peers demonstrate that if they simply scream louder, they will be declared righteous. The internet has broken communication. More people speak by sharing quotes (that they didn’t fact check) or MEMEs than using complete sentences. There are those that know something must be done. The onus is on us to start the dialogue, teach others to communicate effectively, and persevere through the process.
Well, on the plus side this woman was supportive of veterans. When I returned to the “world” in 1970 the MP’s who greeted me on the tarmac at Travis said “It is a good thing you arrived in the middle of the night. During the day we (the MP’s) have to wear ponchos because the protesters are at the fence behind us spitting at us and the returnees.”
Funny how times change, now I get thank you for your service and not taunted as a “baby killer”
Leonard Ganz
Long Beach, CA
Viet Nam 1969-70
If the accusers stay anonymous that tells you all you need to know.
Why do we put so little effort into communication you ask? Because it takes work, and most are lazy. Because it forces us into dialogue which puts us in front of someone else and a topic, which makes it “con front ational”, which many want to avoid at all costs. Sometimes it takes courage to be transparent and authentic… some do not possess that attribute. For others, it may require intelligence, knowledge, and wisdom which is often in short supply these days. So the short answer is,… I believe that it depends upon the person…
I appreciate the fact that you delineate between knowledge and wisdom. The internet, providing us access to almost limitless knowledge, has given people a false sense of superiority. Are we “too smart” for our own good?
The conversation that needs to happen between the military and civilian sides will take courage. If it is not authentic and transparent, no real progress will be made. It will require grace and patience from everyone.
Seth H.
September 9, 2020 15:26Society today has come a long way from where it was, and it’s not always in a good way. The continual search for instant gratification, with the big push post WWII, with advancements in technology and mass production, has affected our ability to communicate effectively, or to some extent at all.
What does instant gratification and work ethic have to do with communication? The answer is truly very simple. To have a dialogue with someone, especially with someone with a differing or opposing viewpoint, requires a certain amount of work. Your brain has to actually turn on, listen and understand what they are saying, and continue to process information in order to bring out a reasonable point of view. It is far easier and much less demanding to simply surround yourself with viewpoints that mirror your own, or to completely ignore communication because it is easier. With viewpoints that mirror your own, you get the instant gratification you seek with minimal effort; the acceptance and appreciation we all seek is merely automatic.
In contrast, with viewpoints that may differ, there is no instant gratification in a dialogue. A dialogue requires your mind to work to respond logically to what you hear. If what you hear doesn’t make sense, then you have to work to make it make sense. If you disagree with it, then you have to work to figure out WHY you disagree with it and then decide if you still SHOULD disagree with it. If you SHOULDN’T disagree with it, then more work is required to change a learned behavior or thought process. Due to this, there may never be any gratification at all, let alone instant gratification; and because of that, many choose to ignore the dialogue completely and live solely in an echo chamber. An echo chamber by nature requires minimal effort to start up and run, and you receive the instant gratification of hearing your thoughts and ideals bouncing back at you from everywhere.
Communication means a two way street, and that means effort is required.
(Just like getting this posted is requiring a lot of effort, with extremely limited internet!)
Drew
September 9, 2020 18:22Seth, it is indeed difficult to process opposing view points. The up and coming generation has not been taught the skills of critical thinking. Rather, they see “news” casters hurling opinion and insult and calling it fact. Their peers demonstrate that if they simply scream louder, they will be declared righteous. The internet has broken communication. More people speak by sharing quotes (that they didn’t fact check) or MEMEs than using complete sentences. There are those that know something must be done. The onus is on us to start the dialogue, teach others to communicate effectively, and persevere through the process.
lenganz
September 9, 2020 14:45Well, on the plus side this woman was supportive of veterans. When I returned to the “world” in 1970 the MP’s who greeted me on the tarmac at Travis said “It is a good thing you arrived in the middle of the night. During the day we (the MP’s) have to wear ponchos because the protesters are at the fence behind us spitting at us and the returnees.”
Funny how times change, now I get thank you for your service and not taunted as a “baby killer”
Leonard Ganz
Long Beach, CA
Viet Nam 1969-70
If the accusers stay anonymous that tells you all you need to know.
Drew
September 9, 2020 18:08Mr. Ganz,
How do you feel when someone says, “Thank you for your service.”?
P.J. Hughes
September 9, 2020 13:49Why do we put so little effort into communication you ask? Because it takes work, and most are lazy. Because it forces us into dialogue which puts us in front of someone else and a topic, which makes it “con front ational”, which many want to avoid at all costs. Sometimes it takes courage to be transparent and authentic… some do not possess that attribute. For others, it may require intelligence, knowledge, and wisdom which is often in short supply these days. So the short answer is,… I believe that it depends upon the person…
Drew
September 9, 2020 18:04I appreciate the fact that you delineate between knowledge and wisdom. The internet, providing us access to almost limitless knowledge, has given people a false sense of superiority. Are we “too smart” for our own good?
The conversation that needs to happen between the military and civilian sides will take courage. If it is not authentic and transparent, no real progress will be made. It will require grace and patience from everyone.