Fall is my favorite time of year. But the fact is, it signifies the end of something; It is death.

I see the leaves on the trees changing colors and honestly they’re more vibrant; they look more alive than they do during summer. But just because something is more colorful doesn’t mean that it’s more alive or healthy.

I love the cool, crisp air. I’m not a huge fan of less daylight but there’s something nice about having a campfire earlier in the night and enjoying its soft glow against the trees, making shadows dance with the flickering flame.

If there wasn’t the fall of man, would we have seasons or would we be stuck in an eternal summer in the garden of Eden??

I think about the many relationships in life that come and go. For a season, someone will enter your life and be a very pivotal figure, someone that you love deeply and that many decisions revolve around. But those relationships might not last, and like the leaves, the person falls away and is left on the ground as we move on.

This isn’t always the case; some relationships become twigs and grow into branches. They last long after the leaves have fallen to the ground, and become dirt. What relationships in your life are the branches that have been grafted into your family tree?

When I was in the Corps, people you were tight with seemed to fall away when you changed duty stations. It wasn’t like you were upset, you just lost touch. The military forces you to live in the moment. Relationships are built out of necessity. This isn’t to say that some are not life-long friends, brothers and sisters born from the burden of the war machine, relationships deeper than blood.

There are habits that we have created both good and bad; some need to stay and others should be pruned. Take stock of your life and ask:
What am I doing that’s helping me?
What is it that I’m doing that’s hurting me?

There is indeed a sweetness in culling the evil from your life. But that too is still a type of death. We must die to ourselves daily, choose to do the right thing regardless of the difficulty that comes with it. You’ve heard the term “shedding dead weight.” It feels good to cut out what is holding us down.

On the advice of a few comments on the article, “While I still can” I bought a device for light therapy. Already I notice a difference in my mood and motivation on these darker, rainy days. I see a much more productive winter season ahead.

No, not all death is beautiful and I’m sure there will be more than a few that take offense or immediately turn away from the phrase. It’s ok. Our experiences inform our responses and unfortunately, some have seen the worst of the worst.

We all have a right to our opinion but we don’t have the right to force it on others. Expressing your opinion is not forcing it, even if the other person believes contrary to what you do.

Outside the clouds have parted and the rain stopped. Sun highlights the falling leaves against the blue and white patchwork sky. End, death, change- something different. It’s not all bad, nor is it all good.

This past weekend was the end of the Pennsylvania Interscholastic Cycling League mountain biking season. It has been a great time since July, but now it’s done. As a team, yes it’s over. As a community, the ride never ends. Have you gotten out of a job and missed the camaraderie? Seek out veterans of that community or perhaps integrate into a new one.

I can’t think of a worse death than dying alone.

For me, a beautiful death would be dying with purpose or at the conclusion of my purpose. As a warrior I was ready to give my life for my country, the people in it, the ideals we are founded on, and quite literally the man or woman next to me on the battlefield. But this isn’t the only beautiful death for this is only the physical manifestation of war. We are in battles daily that most don’t acknowledge.

Fight for what’s right. Live by a standard established outside of yourself and one that causes you to aspire to be more, give more, love more, forgive more, and die for something beautiful.

Drew founded Mental Grenade Jan 2020. He is a follower of Jesus Christ, a medically retired Marine, EOD Tech, husband, father, writer, mountain biker, photographer, facilitator, and fly-fisherman. He seeks to bridge the civilian – military divide and bring hope through honest communication about difficult issues.

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These Veteran stories of struggle, adventure, and post traumatic growth need to be heard!
Join the cause to de-stigmatize mental health issues.
Please SUBSCRIBE, share our website with friends / co-workers, and support us by donation or at the STORE.